During our adoption process, we took a class online called "Conspicuous Families" through Adoption Learning Partners. It was a great course with invaluable information. One aspect of the course addressed ways to deal with comments or questions that may (intentionally but most likely unintentionally) be confusing or hurtful to you or your child(ren). Questions like... " What do you know about his real parents?", "Are you going to have any more of your own?", or even well-meaning comments, such as, "You're such a saint for adopting him."
Well- I have lots of responses ready now when people ask questions such as these in front of Kaleb. However, I just came across these "Thank You for Asking" cards on etsy designed by artist, Jodi Queenan and I LOVE them. They are business card size and come with matching envelopes- "designed to address curious questions and educate the public while keeping a positive experience for your family".
Here is what they say...
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"Thank You for Asking" (front side)
There are many ways to create or build a family. We have chosen to build our family through adoption. Thousands of children will be adopted into the U.S. this year. Our child is legally 100% ours, and just like a biological child, our love for him was born and grew from our hearts. This makes him our real, chosen, beloved son, for whom we would die and give our lives. He calls us mother and father. At times, you may see a family who has both adopted and biological children. It is important to know that these children are siblings, regardless of how they come into the family.
"A Child's Story" (back side)
Every child’s story is unique, whether or not they are adopted. Adopted children are not bought. The cost of their care in his/her native country, and why their first family was unable to care for him/her, is private. For an adopted child, this is their story to tell when they are adults, with the closest people in their lives. But, what I can tell you is that we are not special people because we have chosen to adopt this child. Rather, we are blessed to have been given this opportunity to parent this child. We are also thankful for family, friends, community, and the kindness of strangers to learn and educate themselves about adoption.
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Thanks for Asking Cards
This artist gives a percentage of her profits to the Kolfe Youth Orphanage in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia
Check out her blog.
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